And yes, Behind the Stick is one of them.
So, let’s start with that one.
Behind the stick- either on one of the key service positions behind the bar, or running the Service station (drinks being made for table service). Occasionally used as a term of authority- eg, ”Beth’s behind the stick tonight”,
meaning Beth is leading the bar team. Any questions or problems, Beth’s your girl. Don’t mess with Beth.
The simplest, and most often confused ones (both sides of the bar)-
On the Rocks- with ice. specifically, big cubes of ice. Gin, vodka, rum should all be on the rocks by default. Whiskey and tequila only by request. And even then it’s kinda wrong. No judgements here 🙄
Neat, Straight, Short, Up - no ice. Short glass. Always with whiskeys, tequilas, brandies. Maybe even some high end rums.
Loaded- a big ol’glass filled with big ice. G&Ts, highballs, vodka and mixers.
A well and truly loaded Tom Collins.
So, if someone asks you (and they will) for a whiskey straight up on the rocks, please don’t punch them, just breathe and ask them to clarify. Alternatively, for the scientifically minded, put their drink in a box without their knowledge and tell them until they actually look, it will both be on the rocks and straight up. And then you can explain quantum observation to them. SCIENCE!
The Glass glossary
Or is it Glassary?
Old Fashioned, Double Old Fashioned
Your all purpose cocktail/whiskey/short drink glass. A thousand different varieties, a couple of incredibly pretty ones I’m rather fond of (Libbey crystal cut are my favourite glasses in the world, you’ll see them all over here/all over my house). Also called Lowballs and shorts.
Martinis
Those v-shaped glasses you find everywhere. We’ve now got to a point where nearly anything in a martini glass is considered a martini, but that’s just wrong. A remarkably simple, clean glass for a drink that deserves the same treatment. Note for Espresso Martini makers- IT IS NOT 1984 STOP PUTTING ESPRESSO BEANS IN YOUR MARTINIS YOU ABSOLUTE HEATHENS.
Highballs
Your all-purpose tall glass. gin and tonics, tall drinks of all walks of life. Otherwise known as Collins (after the cocktail, not some bloke named Collin) or Slim Jims (which is a specific slim long highball for G&Ts).
Coupes
A specific kind of martini glass, rounded rather than the deep v-shape normally seen. Beautiful for any number of neat drinks, Manhattans, Espresso and French martinis, Aviations, all that jazz. Note - if you put a lime wedge on the side of one of these glasses I will mock you relentlessly and/or throw rocks at you. Fair warning.
Nick & Nora
Technically a more specific glass,but there’s a terribly pretty glass that’s fairly common in bars now, looks a bit like a fancy sherry glass your gran might have had. Lovely for spirit-heavy drinks that you’d serve Up (no ice), these make for excellent margaritas, or a lovely way to present a very different Whiskey Sour.
Ridiculous terms you will have thrown at you and expect to know even though someone clearly pulled them out of their arse
Well, that’s a ridiculously long title. Pints are the worst. Personal favourites include a Pint of..
Double- Guinness. This one actually has a root in the way Guinness used to me made - there was single x, xx and xxx, referring to different strength. The Guinness that survives today is based of the double x recipe (but now vegan), so it’s a pint of double. Interestingly (for me anyway), Porter strength is a reinterpretation of xxx, and is Bloody Lovely, albeit a Right Kick in the Teeth (yes, capitals are needed)
Green- Carlsberg. cause the label’s green apparently. Bit of a no-brainer there.
Heeeeverle, Hayverley, Hueveli, and inevitably That One-
This one’s for Heverlee, obviously. The pronunciations you will hear of this are heartbreaking. Also applies to Warsteiner, Staropramen, Kronenbourg and any number of Eastern- Block beers. Reader despair.😕
Scottish Pint- you will hear bartenders use this term as a slur. Not a particular pint, just any one filled to the top with no head. Supposed to be a comment on the tightness of Scots.
Also leads to my one and only bar joke-
what’s the difference between a Scot and a Rowboat?
A rowboat doesn’t tip.
To be clear, I did not say it was a good joke.
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