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  • Writer's picturedaishonato

Bartending 101 - Espresso Martinis and What Not to do

Hint- it involves coffee beans.

LEAVE THE COFFEE BEANS ALONE YOU ABSOLUTE HEATHENS ITS NOT 1984 ANYMORE I SWEAR IF I KEEP HAVING TO SAY THIS MY HEAD WILL POP OFF I MEAN I HAVEN'T EVEN TAKEN MY FINGER OF THE SHIFT KEY TYPING THIS I FEEL SO STRONGLY ABOUT THIS CAPS LOCK JUST WILL NOT DO.


I MEAN REALLY WHY WOULD YOU RUIN THIS WITH COFFEE BEANS

Well, I was going to write an article about Mojitos but apparently, I feel stronger about this than anyone really, rationally should. I have a problem, admitting it's the first step to dealing with it.


So, Espresso Martinis. The ultimate after-dinner drink. Classy, loads of caffeine, smooth, everything you could want in a drink. It's odd to think this drink basically does the same job as a vodka red bull, with its combination of stimulants and relaxants, or maybe that's just me too. The whole point of this drink, the whole thing to hold to and aim for, is smoothness. Look at that crema on it- it's like a Guinness! So silky smooth, and the drink flavours should match that. Each item in it is there to ensure none of the others have too much harshness - you'll know very quickly if one ingredient's slightly off.


Ingredients-

35ml Decent Vodka - Absolut, Grey Goose, whatever's at hand. Just a good, neutral, clean vodka. If you're feeling very creative, a vanilla vodka is okay to use, or even a good silver tequila if you're not a vodka person.

25ml Coffee Liqueur - ideally, Toussaint is the best on the market, but it's a little harder to get, and a bit pricier. Kahlua is generally your best bet. Tia Maria if you're completely stuck.

Double Espresso - fresh, if possible. you can keep a thermos behind the bar and batch a dozen shots of pre-shift to make life easier, but the crema you get from mixing is always at its best with fresh, hot espresso. If you're stuck at home, Azera instant coffee (the espresso one) will make a really respectable substitute. With any of the alternatives, 40ml or thereabouts of your coffee's about perfect.

Your standard pinch of salt. Like 2 grains.

5-10ml sugar syrup - to the sweetness you prefer. Wee bit of fine-tuning needed to match your coffee and your desired effect. Another interesting twist I really love is a splash of caramel or salted caramel syrup instead. Just try it, you won't be disappointed.


Note: you can add 10ml Averna to give it a lovely little bit of extra bitterness, and with the salted caramel syrup this drink is the absolute business. There'll be a lot more talk about Averna later.


Method

Chill your Coupe or martini glass. in your loaded shaker, add all your ingredients, coffee last, then slam the shakers shut hard. There's hot and cold going on here at once, and the potential for exploding shakers and you being covered in a coffee-liqueur-vodka mix that does not come out of white shirts. Ever. So make sure that the shaker is sealed well.

Hammer the drink, make sure it's really well shaken up. I have a few friends who actually do this as a two-step shake - dry shake everything including the coffee, throw the ice in and shake again. I don't find it makes much difference with my shake, but it seems to help some people build a better crema. Worth considering if you're having trouble anyway. Double strain into your glass, then finish with a couple of clean lines of Angostura bitters or even mist and flame a spray of bitters over the top of the drink. This adds a wonderful scent to the drink that just finishes the whole thing beautifully.

And I'm not going to mention it again but YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO DO SO DON'T DO IT OR I WILL FIND YOU.



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